Eat Drink & Be Mary: 10 Reasons Why Criminal Minds Has Ruined My Life

8.07.2014

10 Reasons Why Criminal Minds Has Ruined My Life

You guys may or may not know this about me, but I am a scaredy-cat in the fullest fashion.  I'm talking scared of E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G.  But I'm pretty positive I wasn't always like this.  That was until I became obsessed with Criminal Minds in all it's glory.  That show is just plain old terrifying, no way to go around it.



Peeing at Night.  Thanks to good ole Criminal Minds and all their psychopaths, I can no longer pee at night without peering behind the shower curtain first.  Not to mention as soon as I push that flusher, my booty is high-tailing it out of that creepy bathroom (that I have no problem with in the daylight).


Passing a sketchy Slow Moving Car.  This one is more creepy at night, but even during the day it's enough to make me walk a little faster.  Something about passing a car that is moving slowly just gets to me.  Like why, just whyyy are you moving so slowly while passing me.  Obviously there is no other reason, than they are plotting to snatch me up. 


Walking Around My House at Night.  You better believe I'm turning on every single light as I go into each room when walking around my house at night.  You never know when a creepy killer is waiting in the darkness of a room; who knows how he got into your house (I have an obsession with keeping the doors locked) but still he's probably hiding in that dark room.  Better turn on the light.


Alleyways.  Granted alleyways gave me the heebie-jeebies before watching Criminal Minds, after watching the show you know nothing good can come from walking down an alleyway.


Stopping to Pee at a Rest Area.  No way Jose.  I refuse to stop and pee here.  I can't count how many episodes have creeps just chillin' in the girls bathroom/stalls waiting for your cute self to innocently walk in their just trying to empty your bladder.  Nope.  I'll take a McDonald's slightly cleaner bathroom please, hold the creep in the bathroom.



Looking into Windows/Mirrors (at night).  Don't even try to tell me you haven't seen a show where they close the bathroom cabinet and all of a sudden there is someone behind them.  Or how about the episode where the girl goes to take a "selfie" and when she looks back at the picture there is a face looking through the window.  Talk about terrifying.  Straight up gives me chills!  And what girl isn't catching her reflection in all mirrors and windows (sometimes twice) as they walk by.  


Helping a Stranger.  You name it a little miss innocent who lost her dog / needs directions / needs a lift / their dog is hurt / is having car troubles...yep they're scamming to kidnap you.  I've seen it with my own eyes in these dern Criminal Minds episodes.  



The Rear View Mirror.  Something about getting into your locked car at night is just scary.  I'd say I'm not sure why, but I've seen all the episodes where somehow they find a way into your car.  Just waiting for you to drive off, and then they've got you.  Better to just not look into that rear view mirror to see the creep that's back there.


Underneath My Car.  Only at night time, am I super freaked that there is someone underneath my car waiting to grab my ankles.  Kinda like little kids are scared that monsters are under their beds to grab them.  It's just freaky, of course this only freaks me out at night.  Even when you think realistically, what all could they actually do from the 6" space that is under my car.  Clearly cars freak me out.


Doing Anything By Myself.  Looking back at my list is clear to see I'm straight up scared of anything, probably my own shadow while I'm at it.  So needless to say I'm not a huge fan of doing anything by myself.  Some may say that this is a good thing because I'm more alert, but I'm not sure I'm convinced.  I am pretty sure this is over the line of scaredy-cat and on to something else more dramatic.  #help


So there you have it folks, 10 reasons why Criminal Minds has ruined my life.  

This post should also be titled "why I shouldn't watch Criminal Minds anymore." 

...which could then be followed by a post called "...and 1 reason why I can't stop watching: Derek Morgan."  I mean seriously, have you seen the man?  Not to mention I'm pretty emotionally attached to all the characters.

Also see , "another reason why I should not watch so much TV."  Or maybe just these types of shows.


It's incredible (especially once it's all written down) how much this show has affected my actual life. 
What is your biggest fear?  What show has affected your real life?  Has Criminal Minds ruined anything for you?  


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30 comments:

  1. My post title would be 10 reasons I don't watch Criminal Minds anymore. My husband and I watched a the first couple of seasons a few years ago. After a while we stopped because I was getting too freaked out to sleep. I actually tried to watch an episode just this weekend, the first time in years, and I could barely watch 10 minutes of it.

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  2. Hahahaha this is hilarious and I totally get you!! I am with you on this one!! I can't watch anything scary at all for these very reasons

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  3. I'm more cautious because I watch the show love it and will always watch it but will take my 6 ft teenager shopping with me.

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  4. Hahaha I love this! I am obsessed with Criminal Minds. It's actually the reason I got a degree in Criminology (I should probably do a post about that). But yes, the show has made me FAR TOO aware of my surroundings and how many ways I could get kidnapped/killed/etc.

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  5. I also have a love/hate relationship with Criminal Minds! I won't watch it if I'm home by myself and even when Matt is home with me I've been known to 'watch' half the episode with my eyes shut and by hands over my ears!!! And at least once during the episode I ask "Why do we watch this show?!!" Like you, what keeps me coming back are the characters! I love JJ, Derek, Penelope and Spencer.

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  6. HAHAHAHA!!! I totally know what you’re talking about. In fact, just last week a random stranger pulled into my driveway and cornered me while I was getting my mail. He claimed to be buying the house for sale a couple houses down and was asking me about the neighborhood. Then he started asking me if I had a dog and if I ever went on walks alone and the route I take to get to work…it was really strange. And it didn’t really add up that he was claiming to buy a $650,000 house, but drove a beat up old Buick. I was like THIS GUY IS TOTALLY AN UNSUB! I freaked out, ran inside, turned on my security system, and called my husband to come home immediately! We called the realtor who said she has had absolutely NO movement on the house, so we decided to file a police report. Maybe he really was just interested in looking at that house and was just sort of a strange fella, but I’m not taking any chances! My husband told me I’m not allowed to watch Criminal Minds anymore. HAHAHA!

    -Ash
    www.thenashvillianblog.com

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    1. That is terrifying. I would never want to be alone again with that creeper probably lurking in the bushes. Start carrying pepper spray if you don't already!

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  7. OMG I love Criminal Minds! I just recently discovered this show couple of months ago and have been watching it. Haha you're hilarious. Dude - that's why I always get the clear shower curtains. This way I know for sure there's nothing behind those shower curtains although this doesn't help when I stay at hotels that has opaque shower curtains .... www.shoutingchow.com

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  8. hahahaha this is so me!!! I used to watch a lot of Cold Case and I started getting really paranoid about everything so I had to stop watching it. lol!! I still peek behind the shower curtain tho!!

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  9. I love Criminal Minds!! I'm the same way with all of those fears. Now that I'm living in a new state in a not so terrific intersection, my fears and paranoia's have increased exponentially. I'm convinced though that majority of those crimes had to be real; it takes a lot of creativity to come up with those episodes. Can't wait till October for it to come back!!

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  10. I've watched Criminal Minds a few times. I like Law & Order SVU but even that can be bad at times. And those reasons you gave about Criminal Minds ruining your life. You list for me would be 10 reasons why I dont watch the show. :P

    http://faithhopelove02.blogspot.com/

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  11. This is absolutely hilarious. All Criminal Minds has ruined for me is how a man should look ;-) ha ha ha Shemar Moore? Gooooooooooooooooooooood grief.

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  12. I hardly ever watch criminal minds, I'm more of an SVU kinda gal. But I am glad I found your blog - you are the cutest and I can't wait to become a regular reader!

    Have a great weekend! :)

    Sincerely,
    Cassie

    www.cassandralynn23.blogspot.com

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  13. I'm afraid/avoid a lot of the same things and I haven't even watched Criminal Minds ;)

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  14. Hahaha this was an awesome read! Between the time I graduated from uni and got a full time job I was probably watching an episode or two every day because they were always on TV. I started having the most disturbing dreams so I decided to quit. I still love it but I can't binge watch it like any other show, that's for sure!

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  15. Haha! Love this and love Criminal Minds.Great post!

    ~Ashley @ A Cute Angle
    acutelifestyle.blogspot.com

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  16. I 100% get this. I am the exact same way. I also watch WAY too many horror movies and am convinced that all of that is going to happen to me, so at night, and especially if I'm alone, I am a hot mess. Does this make you feel better?: At night if I have to sleep alone because the husband is out of town, I sleep on the couch, because in the bedroom I might not hear someone entering the apartment as well and then wake up to a man hovering over me with a knife. Then, I keep the hallway light on so I can see intruders easier from the couch, I put my pepper spray and a sharp knife on the coffee table so I can grab it in defense, and I set several empty pop cans by the door so when they break the locks and it swings open the cans will fall and make enough noise to alarm them and me. I also quadruple check that locks on every door and get up several times to look through the peephole and check under the door for shadows or people lurking. Yeah. It's a bit much and my husband thinks it's overboard, but better safe than sorry I say.

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  17. Haha...this is funny and true! I can't watch too much of any show like that because I'm already an extremely paranoid person. I grew up "out in the country" as we say and I always refused to be home by myself at night. I was in college and could come home and had to plan my life around whether or not someone would be home at night while I was there. I also have a weird things with checking behind the shower curtain. YEARS ago...I read an embarrassing story in a magazine about someone being behind the shower curtain when she went to pee. Ever since then...I've always checked but only at my parents' house. It's like a habit now. I don't do it at my house...only when I visit my parents. I think it's just muscle memory at this point. :)

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  18. I do this to myself all the time!! Get freaked out by the dark

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  19. Omg this cracks me up because I can 100% relate. I am so beyond obsessed with that show, have been since it premiered and never miss an episode but now thanks to that wonderful show (and one of my favorites and I can't stop watching) I now "profile" people in my head and assume weird people are sociopaths or psychos. I too relate that show wayy to much to real life and now everytime I get into my car at night I worry if someone is in the back or some crazy thing like that. I feel your pain love.

    --Me And My Mini Me
    www.meandmyminime.com

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  20. The helping people one is ALWAYS me anytime I go on a run by myself-- I literally come up with a plan of what I would do if someone stopped and asking me for directions or something.

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  21. LOL Criminal Minds made me super aware of all the criminals everywhere. Everyone is a criminal after 6pm haha

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  22. This cracked me up because I agree with it all! But I can't stop watching either! I did have to make a rule for myself that I won't watch it at night once it's dark. And I started leaving my shower curtain open to save me the trouble of checking behind constantly!

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  23. I used to watch this with my housemates all the time and I'd pretty much have trust issues with meeting anyone new ("what if s/he's a serial killer!?"). I live alone now, but this unfortunately hasn't stopped me from watching it. :[ At least I always check the backseat before getting into my car?

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  24. Too funny. I always get hubby to check all the doors and windows are locked after I watch :)

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  25. LOVE Criminal Minds! It totally does make me scared of everything too. And I agree, that Derek Morgan is probably the best reason to watch the show...he's just gorgeous!

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  26. I love this show- but yes. Yes, it's ruined my life, too! This is so stinkin' true.

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  27. I so agree! I make sure i lock all tr doors and if someonr leaves it unlocked, I give them a gd five minute lecture on how unsafe the world is. I dream about the show nd get scared. And I cant stop watching! I am addicted. I love the characters so much. Morgan, reid, garcia.

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